2014 ERP Business Predictions (for entertainment purposes only)
This is the time of the year for knowledgeable and forward-thinking industry experts to announce their business predictions for the coming year, so I think it’s also fair for those of us who are less knowledgeable and who have a better sense of humor to be given the chance to share our future vision with the rest of the world. In that vein, and coming in under the wire, here are my industry predictions for 2014:
- I predict that Microsoft will divest itself of its ERP products. Microsoft will finally realize that their fortunes are ebbing badly due to a lack of focus on its core competency, which is taking other peoples’ ideas, creating a better version and doing a more masterful job selling them. Buying other publishers’ mediocre ERP products and trying to make a buck selling them for the past decade was a waste of Bill Gates’ time, and MS will finally come to its senses.
- In a related story, I predict that MS will sell its entire ERP portfolio to Open Systems, causing Open Systems to leap to the front of the mid-market ERP space. If you’re a Microsoft VAR, I’d be inquiring about an Open Systems authorization if I were you.
- I predict that Google will purchase a majority holding in Twitter in 2014, and will rebrand the service as Twoogle.
- I predict that NetSuite President and CEO Zach Nelson will be honored as Forbes Magazine’s “Innovator of the Year in 2014”, for pioneering and perfecting the use of “non-GAAP financial statements”. As a result, all major stock analysts will reset their target price for NetSuite shares to $175. Well done, Mr. Nelson!
- I predict that Amazon will release its first version of “ERP on Rails”. It will be a multi-tenant cloud-based ERP product that is supplied to all corporate subscribers of Amazon Prime at no charge. Hosting will be provided by Amazon Web Services, who will use excess server capacity for that purpose. The product will be monetized by the creation of the new Amazon Prime Corporate subscription, and by the ads that appear on every entry screen. Google will artificially bump the ranking of users’ corporate websites by 10% as an inducement to join.
- I predict that the NSA, in an effort to repair its damaged relations with the North American business community, will release a new NSA-branded Business Intelligence Module which will be compatible with all the major ERP vendors’ products. It will allow users to actually connect to their competitors’ internal security systems, enabling them to monitor their competitors’ mobile phones and even their banking activities. This new module required no development time by the NSA. It is being licensed from the Chinese Government and will be white-labeled as an NSA product.
- I predict that Oracle’s Larry Ellison will be captured by pirates off the coast of Western Africa in 2014. Mr. Ellison and his crew and passengers will be released unharmed, but his yacht will be confiscated and resold. Proceeds from that sale will be used to cure hunger in Africa. Those pirates will later be identified by their distinctive SAP polo shirts, and hailed as humanitarians.
The power to predict is an awesome one, and I’m glad that I can share it with you. I’ll check back in with you next year to see how many of these came true. Based on prior years’ predictions, I can honestly say that I’m still at 100%.
Written by Doug Deane, President & CEO of DSD Business Systems.
